


And They Called it Puppy Love

by Dancains



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Dogs, Ed is a greek mythology nerd, Fluff, M/M, Pining, Set in early Season 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-28
Updated: 2018-06-28
Packaged: 2019-01-25 11:11:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12530008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dancains/pseuds/Dancains
Summary: Ed seemed engrossed with the dog as they drove home, answering Oswald's remarks about the city budget with uncharacteristic, monosyllabic replies. The dog laid on his lap, its small tail wagging as Ed carded his fingers through its thick coat. Oswald thought it had a sort of smug expression, if such a thing could be said about a creature that weighed eight pounds.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title from a Paul Anka song because I'm a big sap who names almost every fic after a 50's/60's love song. I have a bunch of longer WIPs I should be working on right now, but I thought I'd drop this short fluff piece that was begging to be posted :)

"...And after you hand off the check to the head of the Gotham animal welfare committee, you'll go select a dog to adopt."

 Oswald's fork paused half-way to his mouth. A piece of fluffy omelette slipped back onto his plate.

 "I'll do what?" He eyed Ed suspiciously over the breakfast table. His chief of staff been briefing him on his planned visit to a newly opened animal shelter that afternoon.

 Ed glanced up from his itinerary, "Oh, it was your secretary's idea. She didn't run that by you yet?"

 "No. She did not." Oswald answered emphatically, spearing another piece of omelette. 

 "Obviously, your popularity is still very high, as we expected in the weeks following your election, but she did think that adopting a dog from the shelter would certainly be a boost. It would help give you more of an...approachable "every man" sort of persona. Her words, not mine," Ed clarified.

 Oswald's expression didn't change. Penny was on thin ice, he thought to himself. 

 He shook his head firmly. "No, no dog. I don't need some animal around here, messing up the place."

 Ed's face fell. "Oh, alright then."

 They picked at their breakfast for a moment in silence. Oswald checked the time on his pocket watch.

 "When I was younger, I really wanted a dog," added Ed, unexpectedly. "Our neighbors even had a basset hound that had a litter of puppies one summer, and they offered me one, but my parents wouldn't let me take it. I never had one since I moved here because there wasn't room in my apartment. I'm not surprised that you're not big on pets, though."

 Oswald's fingers tightened around his cup of coffee. "Well, I could adopt a dog--in name only, if you wanted one. Why don't you pick one out when we go to the shelter."

 Ed blinked in surprise, obvious child-like delight on his face.

 "Really? But, you just said you didn't want one in the mansion?"

 "I'm sure it'll be fine. Just, get a small one, Ed."

 Ed laughed. "Yes sir, Mr. Mayor," he a gave a jaunty salute before getting up to take out his plate. "Seriously, though," he called over his shoulder, "thank you, Oswald."

 Oswald would mentally replay the dazzling smile Ed had flashed him for the rest of the week. Penny had a raise coming her way, he decided. Maybe a muffin basket, as well.

 Later that day, his speech went off without a hitch. The crowd clapped energetically, drinking in every little white lie about how much Oswald  _just adored_ animals. If he poured a little too much enthusiasm into it, it was only because of how happy he had made Ed that morning. 

 Once the ceremony was coming to a close, a shelter worker escorted Oswald to the kennels. As they made their way through corridors lined with large cages, he could feel a hint of a migraine coming on, bombarded by the sound of many startled, barking dogs. 

 At the end of one hallway, he found Ed with a small white dog in his arms, petting it gently behind it's large black ears. He watched him for a moment, irked by how incredibly endearing he found the sight.

 He cleared his throat. "Did you find one you like?"

 Ed looked up, as if he hadn't noticed Oswald's arrival. "Yes! She's a papillon, isn't she beautiful."

 "Sure. Let's get the photo-op done with and get out of here."

 Ed followed him back to the front of the building and deposited the dog into his arms once they had reached the small swarm of reporters and photographers. Oswald posed with the dog awkwardly, knowing his dark suit would soon be littered with dog hair. 

 When they returned to the car, Butch trailed behind them, his arms overflowing with pet supplies from the shelter's store. Oswald chose to ignore his grumbled complaint about not being paid enough. 

 Ed seemed engrossed with the dog as they drove home, answering Oswald's remarks about the city budget with uncharacteristic, monosyllabic replies. The dog laid on his lap, its small tail wagging as Ed carded his fingers through its thick coat. Oswald thought it had a sort of smug expression, if such a thing could be said about a creature that weighed eight pounds. 

 "So, you said it's a papillon?" Oswald ventured, trying to better garner Ed's attention, "That's French for butterfly, isn't it?"

 "Yes," Ed's face lit up, "So named because of their large, wing-like ears," he gestured towards them, "They're very intelligent, apparently one of the smartest toy dogs. Very trainable, as well."

 Oswald nodded, feigning interest to the best of his ability.

 "I decided on a name too, because she didn't already have one."

 "Oh?"

 "Have you ever heard of the Greek myth of Laelaps and the Teumessian fox?" Ed asked eagerly.

 "No, I can't say I have," Oswald deadpanned.

 "Laelaps was a mystical dog, bestowed by Zeus to a woman named Europa. The dog was capable of hunting and catching any prey, no matter how fast. The dog was handed down to her son King Minos, and was eventually used to hunt an animal called the Teumessian fox, a gigantic fox that wreaked havoc and was destined not to be caught. So, Zeus was faced with an inevitable contradiction due to the paradoxical nature of their relationship. Laelaps chased and chased the fox, until Zeus turned both of the creatures to stone, and then cast them into the stars. They're said to now be the constellations Canus Major and Canus Minor."

 Oswald contemplated the story for a moment. "That's very interesting, actually. I suppose you could say that the dog is still chasing the fox, even now. So, you've named her Laelaps, after the dog?"

 "Yes, It also fits because she apparently likes to lay on laps." He scratched the back of her head, contentedly. 

 Oswald let out a loud, bubbly laugh, despite himself, at the terrible pun. It was the type of thing that he wouldn't find funny coming from anyone else on earth. 

 As Ed chuckled beside him, an indescribable warmth in his eyes as he returned Oswald's gaze, Oswald reconsidered the truth in the old cliché "a dog is man's best friend".


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suddenly remembered this little fic and thought I'd continue it. The 3rd chapter is already partially finished.

Letting Ed get the dog was a decision he almost immediately regretted. Even if he was happy to see Ed so enthusiastically occupied by something, he seemed to spend almost every moment of leisure time he had at the mansion with the little creature at his heels--free time he used to spend with Oswald.

What Oswald hated was that the dog wasn't openly hostile towards him--most of the time--but somehow from its body language or the expression on its pinched little face, he knew that he was the unwanted third wheel when the three of them were together.

Just a few days after the event at the shelter, late Saturday morning, Ed called Oswald into the sitting room to show him something. Coffee still in hand, Oswald shuffled over to the sofa and toed off his slippers so he could tuck his legs up under himself. Once settled, he told Ed he had his full attention.

"Good, you have to see this. She's so smart!" Ed gushed. The dog was on the rug below him, it's thick, fluffy tail wagging a mile a minute. "I think she may have already known a few, but regardless, she learns so quickly!'

Oswald tried to look as interested as he could Ed had Laelaps run through a long routine of tricks--sit, stay, roll over, shake hands, barking on command (more of a high pitched yelp than a bark though), standing on her back legs, and even walking a figure eight pattern through and around Ed's legs. Each of these performances earned her a treat from Ed's hand and a ridiculous, fawning coo of "good girl!"

Having to watch anyone else do this would have been mind-numbingly unbearable to Oswald, but, as usual, Ed proved to be his weakness. He rarely saw Ed around the mansion in his pajamas, even on weekends, but today in his flannel lounge pants and tee shirt, fussing over "their" dog, he was a bewitching vision of quaint domesticity. Soon though, Oswald felt a creeping embarrassment as he came to realize how jealous he was becoming of the affection that was being bestowed upon her.

When the dog was done with all of her tricks, Ed looked over at Oswald expectantly. 

"You know, I almost expected her to jump through a hoop."

"She can do that too!" Ed chirped. He bent over, forming a circle with his bent arms close to the ground. On command, the small dog hopped through the space between them.

"Oh. Very nice!" said Oswald, clapping politely. He hadn't really been watching the dog, but instead the taunt lines of Ed's body as he kneeled on the carpet.

Obviously please, Ed stood up after scooping the animal into his arms. "Oh, you want kisses?" he murmured in the same baby-talk tone he had used earlier, as Laelaps began to eagerly lick his cheek.

Oswald nearly choked on his coffee when Ed turned to him and asked "Does Oswald want kisses too?" It took his mind a half second to process that Ed was asking if he wanted to hold the dog.

He shook his head. "No, I'm alright." 

 _Oswald does want kisses,_ he thought to himself sourly, _but not from that damned mutt._

"Suit yourself," Ed chirped, unfazed. After nuzzling her for another moment, he set the dog down on the floor. The second she was free from his grasp she darted towards Oswald and took one of his slippers in her mouth, pawing and biting at it.

"Ed!" 

Before Ed could grab hold of her again, she had darted out of the room at lightning speed, the slipper firmly between her sharp teeth.

Panic flashed over Ed's face. "I'll go get it! She couldn't have gotten too far."

"No, no, it's fine." Oswald assured him, taking a deep breath to pull himself out of the usual fit of temper that would overtake him at a time like this. "It's hers now."

He saw Ed's tense posture relax, obviously aware of the min-crisis that had been averted. He sat down on the sofa next to Oswald, and soon they were both quietly chuckling.

"You know, for a second I thought you might want me get rid of her," Ed confided.

Oswald caught his eye, the laughter fading from his lips. "Ed, I wouldn't do that. I wouldn't want to take away something that makes you so happy."

The smile Ed gave him in return tugged dangerously at his heartstrings. Oswald was surprised when Ed pulled him into a brief, tender hug. He barely had time to melt into the welcome embrace before Ed was standing up again. 

"I should really get that slipper, just so she knows not to do that again. Thank you again, Oswald, you're an amazing friend."

Oswald smiled at him as Ed left in the direction of their little canine thief. He let the smile fall into a tight frown as he contemplated just how deep a hole he had dug himself into by falling for his best friend.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "No, I'll join you. It would be nice to get out for a little while." The words almost left his mouth without the permission of his brain. He pulled off a piece from the strip of bacon on his plate and dropped it for the eager dog below, more for Ed's sake than hers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oswald and Ed's domestic pet-owning adventures continue :) The next chapter will probably be the last.

Gradually, the dog just became another element of their lives. Over time Olga even seemed to warm up to Ed--as much as that was possible--because of it. Apparently she had owned some similar type of small yappy dog that had passed away a few years ago. _Small world,_ thought Oswald. For the most part, he just did his best not to trip over her when she decided to lay down in the middle of the hallway.

It was one Sunday morning a couple weeks later, while Laelaps was under the breakfast table begging for scraps, that Ed invited Oswald to go the dog park with them.

"You do know that we have a very large backyard here, right?" Oswald intoned, spreading marmalade on toast. "You don't even have to share it with anyone else."

"Oswald, that's actually the point. I think it would good for her to socialize with other dogs and a wider range of people. You don't have to go with me, of course, I just thought I'd offer."

Part of Oswald somehow felt like he was being accused of not given the little dog enough attention, even if he knew that wasn't what Ed meant. Besides that, going to a dog park was the probably the last way on earth he'd like to spend a day off.

"No, I'll join you. It would be nice to get out for a little while." The words almost left his mouth without the permission of his brain. He pulled off a piece from the strip of bacon on his plate and dropped it for the eager dog below, more for Ed's sake than hers.

Ed grinned. "Okay, I'll be ready in a half hour."

Soon the two of them were strolling through Gotham park, Ed holding Laelaps' leash. "There's a large fenced off area for dog owners in the northeastern corner of the park," He had explained to Oswald.

"Why didn't we park closer to it then?"

"I thought it'd be nice to get a little walk. Is you ankle hurting? I'm sorry I should have been more considerate."

Oswald immediately felt bad that he had been snappy. "No, no, it's not particularly bad. This is...this is nice actually."

It was slightly chill but not enough to call for an overcoat. The park's grass was still brilliantly green and crisp, but the trees on either side of their path were starting to see the first orange hues of Autumn. They took a side path through a decorative flower garden, the type of thing their own neglected backyard could potentially look like if they had someone properly landscape it, and Oswald considered venturing to link his arm with Ed's, but then gave it a second thought. He almost wished he had complained about his ankle earlier, if only to give him some excuse for Ed to steady him.

When they got to the dog park section, Oswald plopped himself down on a park bench and settled in with a paperback he had brought from home. Ed's enthusiastic use of the mansion's private library had been one of those things that had rubbed off on him in recent weeks, and Ed was always delighted beyond end to discuss literature over dinner with him or during their shared lunch break at city hall.

He got lost in it for a short while, actually enjoying the background ambiance of children playing nearby, the dogs let off their leashes to scamper about, and the occasional bird twittering from a tree branch overhead. Every once in a while he'd glance up at Ed and Laelaps playing fetch.

After a while he looked up to see Ed chatting with two women, evidently other dog owners. Trying to refocus on his book, he caught himself peeking up to watch them from the distance--the three of them laughing at some quip, one of the women briefly touching Ed on the arm. Though they didn't appeal to him in the slightest, he could still tell that they were both conventionally attractive. Oswald felt his metaphorical hackles raise, even if part of him knew he was overacting.

A few minutes later Ed gestured towards him and Oswald accidentally caught his eye, mildly dumbstruck by the oblivious grin Ed flashed him. Tucking the book under his arm, Oswald decided he'd wander over and join the conversation.

He did his best to avoid the flurry of dogs running around as he made the short trek to the group.

"Ah, speak of the devil!" said Ed fondly, draping a casual arm hand over his shoulder. He introduced the two women: "Jennifer and Ash were just telling me about their honeymoon in Florence."

"Short for Ashley," the shorter woman with a flattering blonde pixie cut said when she shook his hand. "It's really nice to meet you."

Honeymoon--that certainly changes things, Oswald thought to himself. He shook it gladly.

"You know, I've never been to Italy," said Ed, almost more as an aside to Oswald.

"Ed, you say that as if I have."

Something about his response made the other woman, Jennifer, laugh quietly. 

Before he could say anything else, he noticed a pawing at his pants leg. It seemed Laelaps had grown bored fighting over a rope toy with the women's two french bulldogs and had taken an interest in him instead.

"Oh, she wants you to pick her up," explained Ed. He picked her up and deposited the small dog into Oswald's arms, as if it was something he did every day. Oswald tried not to look too put off by the little creature.

"God, she's so cute! I don't think we know anyone else who has a pap," said Jennifer.

Ash nodded. "And so well behaved. Not like our little twin terrors," she said, making an affectionate mock-grimace at the two dogs play fighting at her and her wife's feet. "We caught some of your speech at the new uptown animal shelter on TV, by the way, we were so glad to see that the mayor cared as much about animals as we do." She smiled, bright and genuine.

"And that he apparently has more in common with us than that," Her wife added, with a subtle glance between Oswald and Ed.

Either the comment went over Ed's head, or he simply chose not to correct their assumption, as he responded with some comment about the animal shelter. Oswald thought about it for the rest of the conversation, and during their eventual walk back to the car. The feathery fur of Laelaps' ears brushed at his chin as she settled into him arms and stayed their until they left the park.

"Olga has the afternoon off," said Ed, once they were in the back seat of the town car. "Did you want to pick up anything on the way back for lunch or just fix ourselves something at home."

Oswald contemplated the light rain that was starting to pour outside the window. "I'm not in the mood for anything in particular."

"Well, I'm sure the two of us could scrounge up some sandwiches at home. And then I'll make that shrimp fettuccine you like for dinner."

"Mmh. With garlic bread?"

"Of course. Did you know that's not something they really serve in Italy? I could make something different if you wanted to try something a little more traditional, maybe rosemary focaccia?"

Oswald half shrugged. "If it's bread, I'll eat it."

Ed gave him a knowing look, "Oh, I know that for a fact."

"Ed!" Oswald huffed, but there was really no malice behind it.

"How you stay so slim all the while is the greatest puzzle that modern science has faced."

Oswald bumped him chastisingly on the elbow. Their conversation made him think back to the two women they had just met.

"Ash and Jennifer seemed like a nice couple," Oswald said conversationally.

Ed nodded. "They struck up a conversation with me because they recognized me from the papers. They had  _a lot_ of opinions on how we need more funding for public schools. And more of those dispensers that have bags for you to pick up after your dog in places like the park."

"Ah. I can imagine. You want to know something funny? I think they thought the two of us were a couple."

He watched Ed contemplate the comment, how he blinked and pursed his lips. "Oh?" he replied impassively, with a lilt of surprise.

"Well, not exactly funny, per se..." Oswald backpedaled, "That doesn't...that doesn't make you uncomfortable, does it? That someone would-"

"No, no. Not at all," said Ed, just a bit too quickly.

Oswald nodded, studying his shoes as they sat in silence for a moment. "What did you say you were going to make with the pasta? Rosemary something?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now complete ! I have some other WIP's I'm close to updating but for whatever reason this story was begging to be finished.

The rain that had begun to pour on their way home from Gotham park continued on and off for the next few days, steadily becoming a storm that pattered on without forseeable end. 

Oswald watched it through the window with disinterest as he pushed sauteed potatoes around his plate. Ed had deigned to stay late at city hall to finish up some paperwork, mostly proposals from the city council, leaving Oswald to eat dinner alone for the first time in a long while. As he took a pensive sip from his glass of white wine, Oswald contemplated how many meals he had eaten alone during the course of his lifetime, and how it had never affected him the way the lack of Ed's presence did now.

It was an odd sort of thing--surprisingly lovely--the comfortable domesticity the two of them had grown into whilst living together in the mansion. The beginning of their lives being intertwined together, when they had cohabitated in Ed's loft, had been permeated with distinctly different feelings--a distrust that eventually grew into an almost brotherly friendship. Oswald sensed it had been something startlingly new for the both of them. It hadn't been until Oswald's many long visits to him in Arkham that his feelings for Ed began to gradually shift into something more.

Somewhere in the darkness outside a streak of lightning flashed, bringing a white illumination to the dim room for the briefest of seconds, before eventually being followed by the distant, low rumbling of thunder. Oswald knew that if Ed had been there he would have counted off the seconds between the flash and the sound to inform Oswald, with his usual pinpoint accuracy, just how far away the lightning had struck. He wondered if Ed was driving home right now, and part of him was filled was an irrational worry for his safety, considering how bad the Gotham traffic proved to be when it rained. 

Almost as if spurned on by the next radiant shock of lightning outside, Oswald ruminated on all of his past aborted attempts to tell Ed how he felt, and resolved that he would go through with it the next time an opportunity arose. This newfound confidence still simmered deep inside him like a pot threatening to boil as he finished eating in solitude and went upstairs to retire for the evening.

Dressed in fresh pajamas and enveloped in the thick duvet of his bed, he listened to the still steady sound of rain, knowing that he wouldn't be able to peacefully drift into sleep until he also heard the familiar sounds of the front door and Ed creeping up the aging staircase.

Instead, what came was an insistent scratching at his door, paired with a distinctly canine whine of distress. Oswald rolled over, childishly covering his ears with his pillow, hoping the dog would eventually go away but it was to no avail.

He reluctantly got out of bed, his bare feet cold even on the plush carpet, and opened the bedroom door. Quick as a flash, Laelaps darted towards the bed, but couldn't jump high enough to reach the top of it.

Feeling an uncharacteristic pull of sympathy for the little animal that seemed to bring Ed so much unexplicable joy, he picked her up from the middle and plopped her onto the bed.Tail wagging, she turned herself in a circle a few times before burrowing into the spot where Oswald had just been laying. 

"Hey! Keep in mind you're a guest in this bed, little missy," He scolded.  _And probably the only female guest this bed is ever going to see,_ he thought to himself humorously. After he got back in beside her, she inched towards him to curl up at his side. He idly stroked her warm, soft fur as he tried to will himself to go to sleep.

Still in a state of half-dozing, he was roused when he eventually heard the faint creaking of the door. Recognizing the familiar cadence of footsteps on the carpet, he willed himself to keep his eyes closed and feign sleep, wondering what Ed would do. 

"Ah! There you are," Ed intoned softly, no doubt speaking to Laelaps. Oswald expected him to carefully extract the dog from the crook of his arm and carry her back to his room, but instead Ed seemed to simply linger.

"Look at the two of you, a pair of angels--when you're sleeping at least," he murmured to himself. Oswald could hear the fondness dripping from each word despite the sarcasm. He imagined Ed leaning over him as he felt Ed's fingers brush incidently at his side, obviously petting the dog. After another few quiet seconds that seemed like an eternity, Oswald unexpectedly felt Ed touch his forehead; very gently, he seemed to brush Oswald's bangs aside, his thumb grazing Oswald's cheek in the process.

Genuinely surprised, Oswald's eyes blinked open, his whole body stirring. "What..." he mumbled sleepily, only half acting.

Ed had quickly snatched his back, looking almost guilty. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. I was only looking for the dog, and your door was open."

Oswald propped himself on one elbow, taking in the welcome sight of Ed's curling, rain-damp hair and the top few buttons of his dress shirt undone. "You know, you told me she sleeps in one of those little dog beds on the floor. Now I'm beginning to suspect she sleeps up in your bed."

"Well you wouldn't want me to get lonely, would you?" Ed joked, an undercurrent of something deeper beneath his light tone.

"You wouldn't be lonely if you were here in bed with me," said Oswald without thinking.

It wasn't how he had meant to do it at all. The invitation had been much too brash, too suggestive. He braced himself for Ed to react with thinly veiled disgust.

Instead he merely gawked, blinking as if he wasn't sure he heard Oswald correctly.

"I might..." Ed licked his lips nervously, "I might just have to take you up on that offer." Bracing one hand on the bed, he bent over, leaning in hesitantly as if seeking permission.

Feeling as if he was in a dream, Oswald pushed forward the last few inches, capturing Ed's mouth like he had fantasized about countless times before. But this was better than any of that had been--soft, and warm, and real. Oswald turned his head to get a better angle, tugging at Ed's bottom lip, as Ed lifted a hand to gently pet at his bed-rumpled hair. They finally broke apart slightly, still unable to look away from each other, when the small dog beside them began barking excitedly.

"You know what she's saying?" asked Ed. 

"What?" Oswald replied affectionately.

"It's about time."

Oswald couldn't help but laugh, feeling more deliriously happy than he could ever remember. 


End file.
